It is a matter of great importance to make our conversation agreeable. To do so it is necessary to appear humble, patient, respectful, cordial, yielding in all lawful things and to all. Above all, we must avoid contradicting the opinion of anyone, unless there should be an evident necessity for it. In that case, it should be done with all possible mildness, and with the greatest tact, without outraging the feelings of the other party. In this way contests will be avoided which produce only bitterness, and which ordinarily spring rather from attachment to our own opinion, than from love for truth. Believe me, that as there are no dispositions more inimical to human society than those which are given to contradiction - so there is not a person more generally loved than he who contradicts no one. - Saint Francis de Sales
Father Lambert Cousteaux of the Congregation of the Mission showed to all great civility and respect, which were always accompanied with remarkable sweetness and cordiality, though by nature he was inclined to rigor. His countenance was always cheerful, and his words courteous and such as could give no one offense. By these pleasant manners he soon won hearts, so that all who talked with him went away content and happy, and greatly pleased with his affability to all and with the Christian condescension with which he yielded to their sentiments and opinions.
Saint Vincent de Paul was never heard to contend or dispute about indifferent things, but took the word of others with all facility and adapted himself to their views.
We read of Saint John Berchmans that he never quarreled with anyone. For this reason, all his companions not only loved him tenderly, but allowed themselves to be admonished and ruled by him, as if he had authority over them.
- text taken from A Year with the Saints, composed by an unknown Italian, translated by a member of the Order of Mercy; it has the Imprimatur of Archbishop Michael Augustine Corrigan, Archdiocese of New York, New York, 21 January 1891